O hi O

right. I just put this link on my AIM profile so I thought I should add a few more thoughts, you know, pretend I matter. And I’m sorry everyone, especially the younger ones. We must remember that I am now a “writer” so for the first time I am aloud to be fictitious.

I went to see The Life Aquatic with God, I mean Bill Murray, I mean Steve Zissou last night with my sister. I haven’t been to the crestwood Lowe’s in awhile, nor the mall so actually my break has been filled with uberly painful excitement. Anyway, I decided to go to film school in California. But I won’t say goodbye, I’ll say Bon Voyage.

Before that I was in Indiana for Christmas No. 2, visiting my mom’s side of the family, whom collectively, no one cares about. That’s not true, mom, they just move a little slower. You all know how that is…Indiana and all. We cut them off with witty punch lines in the middle of the story, laugh, they laugh, they continue. It takes patience to listen to a story you’ve heard before, especially when it’s not very good…at all. They live on a farm, white flat lined landscape, broken dark windows in the barns sitting just before the shadows of my Uncle’s hunting grounds. I can hear the deer breathing while their hind legs are being bound. Drug through the snow. But I don’t think about these things because this break has been checked off on the list of firsts. My family is emotional hell, selfish crazy and pretending to care. I just laugh now, I don’t know how to do anything else.
It’s hard though, when your dad’s side of the family hits the drinks hard, leaves the kids to my Aunt passed out in the chair and with red party cups in hand sways down the street on a sub-zero stroll. My dad became a bartender earlier in the year. He was showing me how to make a cosmo after I asked where the lid to the martini shaker was. The shot glass was small; he was dumping in vodka with the force of the Niagra, sticky Russian hairspray smell everywhere. He flipped the empty beer glass over and stuck it inside the metal shaker as he told me not to jam it in too tight. Three minutes later six people are standing around the sink running the glass under hot water. My dad has the clenched jaw thing going, which means he’s pissed but more embarrassed, when he comes into the kitchen. He holds up a brand new martini shaker with a strainer lid. Gram Lob gave it to him for his 53rd birthday thirty seconds ago.

this is funny if you’re a lobsinger.

That’s Lob (e) singer.

goodbye